Thursday, June 7, 2012

Jack's Top 10 Shitheads in Human Society (10 - 7)

I'm feeling angsty today.  So let's rant about human shitheads, both individuals and groups.

Apparently, $1 million is just not enough for Kraft Macaroni
and cheese . . .
#10.  Welfare Bums

Yes, I got the inspiration for that from Silver's post yesterday on Western Hero.  Silver wrote about that woman who won the lottery, at least a million dollars, and continued to receive food stamps.  That would have been crazy if that were the only instance of that happening.  A while back, a Michigan lottery winner continued to stay on food stamps for 11 months after winning $2 million.  I'm sorry to break it to you, Liberals, but welfare bums do, in fact, exist.

"But Jack, Bill Clinton made sure that welfare bums can't be on welfare for life!"  Well, hypothetical nay-sayer, Clinton tried but failed.  I've met the welfare lifers.  Hell, there are some shitbags on my dad's side of my family that are welfare lifers.  Some women have babies because they know the government will give them more money for it.  Think it doesn't happen?  Well, then you just don't get out as much as you should.

Yep, you've been snowed.
#9.  The 1%

Uh oh, I'm going to get some Red gorrilla dung flung at me, I'm sure.  Just to be clear, I don't consider every single rich person or corporation to be part of this "1%."  Being rich doesn't make a person evil or immoral.  The term "1%" I think can legitimately be used to describe those few rich assholes that really have boned the country and the economy.  Sorry, but you can't tell me that the hedge-fund idiots, and the shitheads in our financial institutions didn't contribute to all the problems we're having.

And why did they screw us?  To make more money of course.  JP Morgan Chase is being investigated for bad trading (presumably by trading for their own profit, against the interests of their customers).  Let's not even mention the guys at AIG.  Weren't they the ones that paid their excecutives bonuses with your tax money?  There are people in this world who profit off of your misfortune, if it can even be categorized as misfortune.  The "misfortune" that many have suffered was purposely manufactured by these low-lifes who increase their personal wealth by engineering your financial shortfalls.  Does that sound like the behavior of an exemplary human being to you?

Yep, he's been snowed.
#8.  The 99%

"Well that's incredibly contradictory, Jack!"  No it's not.  The 99% are the dumbasses that went to the Occupy protests and chronicled their experience on Twitter or Facebook via their iPhones.  Their hearts were in the right place, but unfortunately their brains were not.  They protested "big business" and "evil corporations" while using the very goods that the Robber Barons provided them.  They were angry that big businesses hurt small businesses . . . all the while ruining some small business owners because their protest prevented customers from frequenting their establishments.  Morons.

And don't think you get off the hook just because you decried the "99%."  The 99% includes the fools that have been snowed by the rich people who boned you.  "This is class warfare!!!"  Right, says the guy that has basically bought-and-paid-for congressmen in his pocket (sorry, but lobbying is not a squeaky-clean beacon of moral uprightness).  They got you to believe that it's okay for them to screw you over for their benefit, and you took it hook-line-and-sinker all because of what, taxes?  Some silly notion that Bill Gates will stop investing because his marginal tax rate increases by 15%? 

They got you to throw your Christian morality completely out of the window.  Yep, you're definitely going to hell if you are sexually attracted to the same sex, but you're totally justified in being a multi-billionaire who allows people to starve.  That's totally what Jesus would do.  If Jesus were rich, and he saw a thousand people begging him for food, he'd tell them that they are shithead welfare bums who need to go out and get a job, because it's his money and he doesn't owe any of them one red cent.

Corporations and rich people are not inherently evil.  Deriding the rich for allowing the poor to suffer is not about "class warfare," or socialism.  It's about justice.

I never forget the face of a douchebag.
#7.  Pastor Terry Jones

What a douche.  What's the best way to prove to the world that you're better than your enemy?  Well, be just as shitty as your enemy of course!

Terry Jones is so ridiculous on so many levels that it's mind boggling.  First, he's obviously a hypocrite because I'm fairly sure that he would not appreciate a Muslim burning a bible.  Secondly, he's a complete moron because his actions only create more hatred.  The idiot basically confirms all of the misconceptions that hold Christians as being evil infidels.

And really, what's the point?  Does he think he's being a soldier for Christ or something?  If so, then that would be endlessly ironic, because Jesus was a pacifist.  He can't think that it would actually convert Muslims, because who would want to be a part of a religion in which people have no respect for the beliefs of others?  I guess every religion has it's morons and nutjobs.

1 comment:

Silverfiddle said...

Stupidity and cupidity will always plague the human condition.

The least we could do is to get our government to stop subsidizing and rewarding it...